Warning: Graphic language ahead. So if the word vagina offends you, don’t read this.
The chills would not stop.
The nondescript carton of the drug had simply read ‘Recommended to be administered with painkillers’. The warning should have been underlined twice.
Trust wished for death. She truly prayed for it. She tossed and turned like a mad man during his ministrations, biting her lip to keep from screaming in pain.
People said the D and Cs hurt worse than this. Trust disagreed. For someone who had monthly period cramps she had thought she was used to pain. The drug Kitan had helped her obtain induced a pain that was so blinding and nerve-racking it could be mistaken for dementia.
She remembered when she tried to insert the first few capsules into her vagina as instructed. Kitan had asked if she needed help. She was far too desperate to feel ashamed at the time yet she had insisted on doing it on her own. She could reach her cervix on her own thank you very much. He had done enough as it was.
He has insisted on performing the procedures at his house. It would take 2 – 3 days she had been told.
Procedures. It sounded cold, like the steel of a surgical cutting blade. But the word was apt and nothing about what she was doing implied warmth.
Her parents thought she was sleeping over at Nini’s. And Nini being the ever ‘dependable’ friend was tucked away in South Africa on yet another photo shoot.
Day two of the ‘procedure’ had dawned and Trust had alternated between crying, dry heaving, actual vomiting and banging her head against Kitan’s headboard.
Even now he was asleep in the guest room while she tossed from side to side on his own bed wishing the pain away.
Another bout of cramps hit her and she bit into the pillow to muffle a groan.
She wondered if the drug would work.
Sanitary towels were in place to absorb any blood that came with the process. However the last time she checked, the towels were as pristine as ever.
The cramps were her body’s way of trying to expel the fetus. Google had volunteered the information. Paranoia had made her into an avid researcher.
The door opened and she blinked to adjust her eyes to the sudden brightness courtesy of the low-hanging light bulb in the corridor.
“How are you now? Did the Tramadol kick in yet? ” Kitan asked stifling a yawn.
She shook her head slightly. He sank into the bed beside her and she reached for his hand like a life support.
“It hurts so bad” she breathed as tears formed at the corner of her eyes.
Kitan blinked. She was squeezing his hand a little too tight but he didn’t mind.
“It will work,” he said matter of factly.
He hoped he sounded almost convincing. The truth was he was scared shitless. He’d never done this before.
He’d accompanied an ex-girlfriend to get a D and C back in the U.K but she had been experienced.
Looking at Trust now, he felt a tug on his heart strings. She didn’t deserve to go through this life-altering experience.
However having the baby would have been life altering as well. A small voice in his head said.
He stroked her hair absently.
“Are you hungry?” He asked in an attempt to make conversation.
She chuckled and he smiled. At least there was some humor to be found in this situation. He thought to himself.
“I think I’m dying” she finally said feebly.
“No you’re not,” he said firmly. “I won’t let you”
She smiled weakly and he felt her grip on his hand tighten for the briefest moment.
“It’s been six hours now. Time for the next dose” he said. “Can you do it? Do you need my help?”
She shook her head quickly. “I’ll do it” she answered. “This is not how or when I want your hand up my vagina”
“Ha! You’ve got jokes” he said dryly as he lifted her to the bathroom.
She was not petite by any standards but she felt small in his arms. He placed her gently on the edge of his bathroom tub and proceeded to wait outside while she did her business in the toilet.
He had consulted an ex-girlfriend just to get the name of the drug.
Then he’d had to jump hurdles to buy it. He had also called in a favor from an old Doctor friend just to get the prescription that would allow him to buy it.
What if it didn’t work? He found himself wondering once again.
Trust…No, Iyabo…came out minutes later looking as pale as a zombie. She swayed slightly causing a slight panic to course through him.
“Are you okay?” He asked.
“B-blood clots. S-several of them. I-I think it w-wor..” She collapsed to the floor in a dead faint.
She was in his arms before her head hit the floor.
Author’s Note: this might seem short but I am really trying to not rush the story. Also, this story in no way depicts my stand on certain sensitive issues. Finally, please leave comments.